hello again

I am back. So grateful for those five weeks to myself. Feeling a bit more balanced. A bit more organized. So without any further adieu, here is the new blog:

GROWING MY ROOTS

and, as of this post, THIS blog will no longer be added to. Keeping it alive for the sake of previous posts. But no more new posts. Enjoy the new blog!

confessions of an almost broken woman

Change of plans. I need five weeks. Five weeks where I don't blog or think of time constraints (that don't even really exist). I am struggling with who I am and what I am suppose to be. Sorry to disappoint, but I feel I need to focus on myself right now. I am trying too hard to please everyone around me (and failing miserably, as I am learning). So give me a few weeks (two of which will be spent watching the Olympics, no doubt) and I will return to my blog. The new one. That I feel horrible about postponing. But my kids need me. And my husband needs me. Which means I need to find me. Thanks, friends.

And just so you know, I am not depressed. Because I have been there and know that feeling. I just feel stretched in too many directions. Like I am being drawn and quartered. While under water.

wednesday what

Look who's 2 months! Love this sweet girl.
Not much new. Hit my plateau with basic dieting, so trying something a little more intensive.I will write about it in a week.On the new blog.Been designing like crazy this last week. And collecting a bajillion sources.One week, people.I started a project on the house without talking it over with Robert first.Oops.But we all know it is going to be awesome. So no worries.Taking step by step progression photos and will make a video for the reveal.Also next week. So yeah. Next week things will pick up a bit.Diet review.Project reveal.Baby blessing.NEW BLOG.

wednesday what

Here is sis. 8 weeks old. 11 lbs. 3 mo clothing.Growing like a weed.Love her. The boys love her. Robert loves her, too.She is a peach. But she will let you know when she is mad in a heartbeat.
Not much new.Working like crazy to get things set up for the new blog.It will be up and running on August 1st. So two weeks!I am excited. Other than that, nothing special or out of the ordinary.Just trying to survive the wretched heat of the Arizona summer.

wednesday what

I almost forgot.Again. I've been doing that a lot lately.So sorry. I mean it's not like I have my hands full...
I seriously don't even know what has happened in the last week. I have been on my diet for 10 days.And have dropped 4 lbs. Hopefully, in the morning, that scale will tell me it's 5 lbs down.It has been hard at times. I miss my Heath Klondike bars. But grapes are good.The major shocker for me is how much a portion size really is. It is painful to see how many calories are in one cup of anything.And then to realize just how small one cup is.It has been hard to exercise every day. Mainly because I have zero energy from four kids.But I do. Every day so far. And I love to feel the burn. Means my body is changing.I bought a new exercise outfit. And a new scale. And the newness of both has kept me going.
Today Joel and Lucas had their first swim lesson.We have a friend that teaches kids to swim at the Y. Point blank, they suck. Seriously.It was entertaining at first. Then painful. Then frightening.I got so caught up in how they were doing with the lesson that Daniel nearly drowned.Momentarily forgot he can't stand alone well enough on the lagoon step.But I remembered as I saw his head sink below the water... Oops.No worries, he was totally fine. Don't think he even cried.
Natalie? Oh Natalie. Her eyes are blue. Makes me happier than a clam.Now I have 50/50 with eye color amongst my kids. Soothes my OCD brain.She is basically in 3 month clothing at 7 weeks. Weighs 10.5 lbs. Small for my babies.Wonderful sleeper. Horrible eater.In fact, the later is causing me much stress. For the last 3-4 weeks, she has struggled.Eats for 5-8 minutes. Then stops. Doesn't fall asleep. Just stops.And wants to resume again after a 10-15 minute break. This stretches on for about 2 hours at a time before her next nap. It is killing me. I do not have the time nor patience for it.There are three others who need me.I just don't know what to do. I don't want to give up nursing since everything is going well for me.But I don't want to feed on demand or I would be nursing all day.I don't want to switch to formula since I CAN nurse.But I don't want to get super frustrated every time I feed her.Any input would be lovely.
My new blog design is coming along.I have no clue when it will be up. Not going to say a particular date either.I do not need undue pressure. So sometime. In the nearish future.Keep a look out.

thursday wednesday what

I love when I get good pictures of my littles. I think this is a good picture.Notice how Daniel looks like no one. Robert questions it.
Sorry about yesterday. I was sick. Still am.This past week has been crazy. Racquetball. Painting. Date night. Painting. Laundry. Pilates. Painting.And, as always, four kids. Monday was ridiculously productive. Got SO many things done.Tuesday was absolutely unproductive. Got nothing done.It was Tuesday night that I started to feel blah.Come Wednesday, full on sore throat, post nasal drip, and groggy head.Ugh.Despite my yuckies, we went about Wednesday as planned. Mostly.Ward pancake breakfast with both sets of parents. Loved it.We got to see how silly Joel is once again.He is one of THOSE kids when it comes to Primary performances.Can't wait for the Primary Program... Not.Once we got home, I basically curled up in a sad little ball of sickness.We had planned to swim at my parents' house, but had to forgo that.Rain. Oh, and I felt like crap.Robert baked the cookies I was suppose to make.Then we went to Robert's parents' house for hamburgers and hot dogs.And that was it. No fireworks. Which I am okay with.
Oh. Btw. I started a new "diet". No more sugar or salt.Not like full out. But no sweets like ice cream and such.And no added salt to my food. I am 8 lbs away from my pre-pregnancy weight.13 away from my wedding weight.And 18 away from my goal weight.So I am eating healthier. And rocking the dancer Pilates.My body will thank me.

wednesday what

Yeah. No what today. I am sorta sick, so my wednesday what is going to roll over into a thursday thoughts. And my new blog will be launched SOON (secretly mad at myself for not making it happen July 1st - I like clean numbers and fresh starts).

wednesday what

Look! It is Wednesday and I'm posting.You should be proud. We finally managed a picture of our family of six. With four under the age of four, it couldn't be better.Seriously. Joel looks like a lunatic in the 56 other shots.I have cute kids.
So. As of late.My cousin had a baby three weeks ago.My sister in law had a baby one week ago. Yay babies!Installed AMAZING cordless blackout blinds. Love, love, love them.Baked some delicious orange creamsicle cookies for my dear neighbor's birthday.Swam with all my babies. Well, I had Natalie. My mom and husband had the boys.Cooked dinner for the first time in years. Not kidding. It has been about two years. Pathetic, I know.Freaked out over shortcake. Long story. But near mental breakdown because of my dad's favorite dessert.Celebrated triplets turning three at a pirate party. Evaded a water ballon fight.Celebrated an amazing friends upcoming arrival of her baby boy. Cannot wait to see him. Yeah. Nothing HUGE personally. But life is life. Just keeps moving along.And since I am a silly OCD girl, I thought I would leave you with a set of comparison photos.My cousin and I. At 7.5 months pregnant. And with our 2.5 and 4.5 week old babies.

oops

Remember that one time I forgot to do a "wednesday what"? Oops. Something about having four little ones to keep track of makes me forget things here and there... Here are two cute pics of sister to help you forgive me... I WILL remember next week.

wednesday what

This poor dude. Still doesn't get it. Soon he will not remember any different.Not there yet.Got to admit, he is the one that currently makes me smile the most.Joel and Lucas are fun. But they talk back.Natalie is precious. But she is basically a blob with a head.Daniel smiles just because you look at him. Laughs because you laugh.He will always be my baby boy. My Bubs.
So what of us as of late?Well. Last week got worse before getting better.Broken AC and indoor temp of 86. Joel breaking out with a body-covering rash.Me eating trace amounts of gluten and being wiped out for a day.Yeah... That was just Thursday. Since then:Photographing my cousins new baby.First time back to church since Natalie arrived.Discovering Natalie has a slight umbilical hernia.Having my couch painted with finger nail polish by two naughty boys.No sleep. Lots of sleep.Movies. Trampoline. Klondike bars. And Dr. Pepper.I have a feeling life will never be dull.
Btw. Contemplating making a blog change. Like ditching this blog for a new one.Don't worry. Still plan to update about us. Just want to appeal to more.(basically, I want to be a ridiculously awesome blogger)July.

Natalie

Sweet Natalie. My little peach. The preview from her newborn photo session is up on the Green Apple Images blog. I am so in love. With Natalie. With the pictures. With all of Jen's work. Click HERE to go see the pictures. Leave a comment on the Green Apple Images blog letting Jen know how talented she is. Personally, I think Jen is absolutely amazing.

wednesday what

Totally forgot it was Wednesday. Oops.

It has been... a day. Not bad. Not good. Let's go with long.

Doc appointment in the am for Natalie. 7lbs 12oz. She's growing.

Ruined the cute carseat canopy on the infant carrier. Brushed up against a tire.

Cried. May have gotten post-pregnancy hormonal hysterical.

Googled a solution after my meltdown. Saved the carseat canopy.

Learned that a tip I found on pinterest really works, so win/win.

Oldest child sort of threw up. Not enough to make me think he is super sick.

But enough to make me stress about the remainder of my day.

Realized too late that I forgot to change my shipping address with my print lab.

No package. Delivery confirmation. No refund. More tears.

Reordered. Got a call much later from FedEx. They caught the mess up.

My package will be delivered tomorrow. Just need to cancel the reorder.

Went with my mom (& 3 youngest) to visit a return missionary couple. Great time visiting.

Two youngest boys ate way too much cake at the homecoming.

Came home and put the boys to bed on my own. Long process.

Hubby is playing with brothers/dad at ball game. Fun for him. Lonely for me.

JUST realized the thermostat screen is blank. Which means the AC is most likely dead.

Dreading what a dead AC will mean tomorrow.

But now I get to just sit and relax. Cuddle my baby girl. Eat ice cream.

Unwind...

five

Five years ago, I put on a pretty white dress. And went into a gorgeous building. And married the most magnificent man I know. In the past five years, he and I have supported one another in finishing our Bachelors degrees. And in holding various jobs. And in removing all debt (minus the house). In the past five years, he and I have welcomed four beautiful children into the world. Not every moment has been perfect. But every moment has been real. And has brought us one moment closer to where we want to be.

wednesday what

This picture makes me smile.I am having Jen do my newborn photos on Friday.But I couldn't resist snapping a few shots while Robert and the boys were at church on Sunday.Going to use this for her birth announcement. So sweet.
I have a confession. One that may make you think I am absolutely crazy.I love labor.Seriously.Labor and delivery is the climax to the 9 months of pregnancy. You wait and wait and wait. And labor is what you are waiting for. That moment where you finally meet the little one inside of you. The one you have been imagining since the moment you found you were expecting.I don't know why, but I enjoy the adrenalin rush of it all.Maybe because my last three deliveries were amazing.Three contractions and out. Two contractions and out. One push and out.Regardless of why, I love it.Which is why I get a little sad when I think that Natalie is most likely our last.Every time I drive by Banner Gateway, my heart aches a little.I think back on the times that Robert and I went into Labor & Delivery.When we were in the final stages before meeting our newest little addition.Being in labor.Getting my epidural and receiving sweet relief from the contractions.Resting and soaking up the moment.Delivering.Holding my precious newborn for the very first time.Determining who they look most like.I think my heart will always ache a little when I drive by Banner Gateway.It's okay. My time is over. Which also brings me excitement.I have all these little babies. And now I get to focus on their growth.I get to focus on teaching them.I get to focus on nurturing them.I get to focus on loving them.

baby girl

I'm sure some of you are waiting for THE post. The one containing every detail regarding Natalie's birth. Hate to tell you it isn't coming. Not in post form. Don't worry. I will share it. You just have to take the extra initiative to click. Why? I understand that not EVERY person cares to know. So if such talk as "cervix" and "membranes" offends or digusts you, don't click the photo below. Which, by the way, is a picture of my doc with all four of my children. Whom he delivered. Dr. Beck is an amazing man.

Click the pic for Natalie's birth story

So. Some of you may have been wondering how I am going to document Natalie's monthly growth. And some of you may have seen the picture on Facebook. But this is what I plan to do. And I am so excited. Because I will never outgrow my love for chalk.

Yes. I drew those flowers. They match her bedding. Or, rather, ALL the fabric associated with her...

birthday boy

So. I lied. No bombardment of pictures. Turns out I didn't take a billion photos. Which is weird for me. It feels like, with four kids, I never get a moment. No time to juggle a camera with so many little ones. At least not yet.
Before Natalie arrived, Robert periodically asked what our plans were for Daniel's birthday. "Have a baby?" Once we had the baby, we both kind of forgot until the night before his birthday. Spur of the moment cupcakes with both sets of grandparents. Extremely simple and easy. Amazing, considering the fact that I thrive on adorable productions. Just a few toys and the perfect amount of socializing. I can't believe my [not] baby is one.
And, of course, we have the FINAL chalk photo. Had to bribe him. Amazingly enough, I got a smile out of him. Well, Robert got the smile. I just captured it.All 12 months. So excited with how this turned out.

wednesday what

Here she is. Little miss NATALIE VIOLA ROOT

May 22nd, 11:59am

7lbs 9oz, 20.5in long

Nearly no pain during labor (prior to epidural).

Came out with one half-hearted push.

Seriously easy peasy.

Me? Felt amazing after.

Until today. Soreness is kicking in.

But for having birthed four kids in under 4 years, I can't complain.

Going home in a few hours.

So a bombardment of pictures is surely soon to come.

new

A year ago (in three days from today) I welcomed my last little guy into the world. Pushed through two contractions. A total of 4 minutes. And he came. All 8lbs 5oz of him.

Today I welcomed my first (& probably last) little girl into the world. Pushed once. A total of 15 seconds. And she came. All 7lbs 9oz of her.

She is my smallest baby (by 4oz). And the one I feel I have been waiting the longest to meet. Brown hair and steel blue eyes, just like all her brothers. My little piece of heaven.

baby!

Ha. No, I haven't had mine. But I bet that title got you wondering. Nope, today was a day to celebrate my sister-in-law in all her pregnant glory. She will be having a baby boy towards the end of June. Yay! So I cohosted her shower today. And took some pictures. And did NOT use my computer at all for uploading. I seriously cannot get over my happiness at not having to touch a computer. It wouldn't be such a big deal if our laptops weren't both half broken. Or if I had an Apple. Sigh. But before you judge my photos, let me just say that I totally forgot to adjust the white balance. So the coloring makes me cringe a little. Or maybe a lot. Hopefully I will remember to make the necessary adjustments when baby girl comes. Or I will just share a bunch of black and white photos. ANYWAY. The shower was adorable. Animal themed with blue, green, orange as the main colors. Everything turned out perfectly if I do say so myself. Ps. Those animal crackers? Yeah, I hand dipped 16 dozen. Not that I counted... Pps. I hate donkey animal crackers. They just give me a bad vibe. Don't ask... Seriously. DON'T judge me by these photos. I just didn't want to edit with my computer...

wednesday what

I am over the moon with excitement. Several reasons.First, and most basic: I can upload pictures with my iPad. Without having to deal with a computer.It is life-changing, I swear. So when baby girl comes, I can post pics 10 min later. Just kidding. 20 min later...Second, and most important: my maternity photos are done!Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Sorry for that. Just excited.I am SO SO SO happy I did this. Every woman should feel beautiful during pregnancy.I think Jen did a phenomenal job of capturing that, don't you?This was definitely worth the investment. Especially since baby girl is the last.Jen is amazing. I cannot WAIT to see newborn pictures. Below are just a few of my favorites. Click HERE for more. And check out all of Jen's work at Green Apple Images.In case anyone is wondering:Shirt: DownEast BasicsPants: Old Navy MaternityShoes: Rack Room ShoesNecklace: Premiere DesignsFloral pin: Hobby Lobby